Of Adulthood and Choices

Do you remember when you were young and it was so easy to answer the question, “What would you want to be when you grow up?”. During my time, the automatic answer for that was, “Doctor”. Why? Because Doctor is equal to cha-ching, mollah, $$$, M-O-N-E-Y. I find that amusing now though, it’s quite humorous how we have the mentality that when you become a Doctor, you’d automatically become rich. But what what we didn’t know back then was that you also have to invest a LOT of money before you can become one. So if you think about it, it’s money for money. That’s basically how the world works.

I don’t know why I had to blabber that out but what I’m getting at is that when you actually grow up, you tend to get confused and  answering the supposed-to-be-simple question, “What would you want to be when you grow up?” becomes the most complicated question in the world.

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I’m an indecisive person but I always knew the type of work I wanted. (You know, the type that doesn’t involve human interaction hahaha! 😉 ).  I have always been fascinated by technology so choosing BSIT as a course in college was an evident choice. On a side note, Tourism was actually my first choice but due to my personality and undeniable lack of height, I had to choose IT.

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I’m one of those people who can pledge that BSIT is not an easy course. It involves a lot of math, problem-solving, logical reasoning and never-ending sleepless nights of programming. Believe me, I have no idea how I’ve gone through college without totally going insane. There were times that I would think I chose the wrong course and that I wasn’t smart enough to be a programmer. Those thoughts almost made me shift but miraculously, I pursued and eventually finished the course.

When I graduated, I thought I would finally be able to lift all the weight I was carrying on my shoulders but of course, that was not the case. The next thing I know, everything was piling up. Choices upon choices, problems upon problems and a hundred questions I have yet to answer (e.g. “When are you going to get married?”, When are you going to work abroad?”, “How much do you earn?”, “When are you going to buy a house/car?”).

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Basically, life happened and just like everybody else, I had no choice but to turn into a full-fledged adult. I’m not there yet though, not even close. Somehow, I’m still underneath the wings of my parents but slowly and surely, I will find the courage to “build” my own wings.

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